This is one of those weeks.
A bad one for me.
Too busy, too hurried, too much schoolwork,
too much studying still needs to be done.
One where I have spent little time at His feet -
and therefore, I feel my sword is not sharpened.
"Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God."
Eph. 6:17
I have not put God or quiet time with Him first.
I have so much to do, and so little time to do it.
And sadly, I flounder around, trying to get it all done -
And so I end up frustrated, acting in ways that are not like me.
Not the me I want to be.
Without daily reading His Word, I have not let it change me.
"For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart."
Hebrews 4:12
I have lost my temper
I have not reflected He who is inside of me.
Once again, I have felt hot tears brim my eyes,
feeling the sense of failure - at my own mistakes.
Instead of flailing all day - rushing from one task to another,
feeling overwhelmed by it all -
I need to take it to Him.
The hurts, the sorrow, the things I must do,
the frustration, the schoolwork, the grades,
the kids, the husband,
my time, my wishes, my fears.
"In the morning, O LORD, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait in expectation."
Psalm 5:3
I know the things I should do, and don't.
And then I wonder why?
Wonder why I am feeling a mess and making a mess of things.
Oh if only I would bring it all to Him.
To eat His Word - to savor it,
to linger over it.
To go to it for my answers, not to the phone or to a friend,
or others with fumbling petitions.
"And he said to me, "Son of man, eat what is before you, eat this scroll; ..."
"So I opened my mouth, and he gave me the scroll to eat.
Then he said to me, "Son of man, eat this scroll I am giving you and fill your stomach with it." So I ate it, and it tasted as sweet as honey in my mouth."
Ezekiel 3:1-3
Oh, that I would eat, and be satisfied.
To be filled with Him -
that I would look to nothing else.
That I would give Him my time, first.
That He might change this heart of mine.
Posts
