Have I really done this?

So, I have done something that I can't even believe I have done.

And without the prodding and pushing of a very dear friend (Rachel), I probably wouldn't have done it. I see how God works in more ways than we think - and I just know He is working through her.

I have been thinking/wondering/worrying/praying about what I will do when I no longer have little kiddos at home. Two off, one to go. I have absolutely loved the mothering season of my life. I wouldn't have traded it for anything. I have been so blessed to be able to stay home with my children since I was pregnant with my first child. If I had to go to work during these years, I would have cried my eyes out. And honestly, I'm not ready for this time with Joshua at home with me to be over - and it won't be for a little while.

But, the time will come when he is in school, and I have tried to think what I would love to do, as a job, with the latter part of my life. Clay will be retiring from the Coast Guard in a few years, and I would love to have a career in place for when that time comes. I am a little afraid of all the changes - I honestly do not like change much at all, and am very happy with the way life is right now.

However, I do have a logical side that has to push that wishy-washy, stuck-in-the-mud self out of the way on occasion.

So what do I like to do? What is something that interests me? What could I see myself doing as a job? I figure if I go back to school, and spend all that time and energy on studying and juggling kids and house duties, it better be something I will really like.

This is where Rachel comes into play. I have been praying for God to show me ("please, God, show me!") what He would have me to do.

Rachel has gone back to school, taking some online classes. She is going to be a nurse. She kept calling me, "Kristy, today you need to register." "Kristy, are you going to register for school?" "Kristy, did you do it yet?" And on and on.

So I did!!!!!

I went to a local college, signed up, payed the registration fee, got my placement test study guide and date to take the placement test, got the orientation date and a list of all the things I need to do to make this happen. Since I no longer have my birth certificate, diploma, or shot records - or even my marriage license for that matter, thanks to a nasty hurricane nearly 4 years ago, I have to go get all those things. And I think I need 2 shots, ouch! I am such a baby.

Now, there are moments I think - "Oh My Gosh, what did I do?" And fear creeps into me. I worry how I will go from the life I have now - reading whatever I want, whenever, being on a pretty relaxed schedule, to whatever it will be like in the fall. Then I remember how I have been praying about this, and I know it was God who led Rachel to help (pester) me into the direction I was was supposed to go. Because He knew that without that nudging, I probably wouldn't have.

I have some ideas on what I would like to do. I love people, caring for them, helping them, and taking care of them. Alot like what I do now - here in my house. Except then I would get paid for it. I have thought a lot about nursing, but think I may be too much of a wimp - and have gotten advice from people in the medical field that makes me think seriously about something else.

My plan right now is to go into Radiological Technology (X-Ray Tech), which has the same amount of schooling as nursing. Then, go for the extra schooling to get to what I really would love - a degree in Ultrasonography, commonly called sonography. It will take longer, and if I am sure I got this right, I have to get a degree in Radiological Technology first - before I can go to school for the sonography part.

Again, "what have I done?" crosses my mind. But then another part of me is so excited. Afraid I will not be good at something. I always did well in school. I was always on the honor roll, mostly in honors classes, but that was when I had the fear of my dad at home with the belt. And no cell phone, no computer, one TV in the house, no kids, no responsibilities (none!) - nothing but me, school, my little bedroom, and lots of study time.

Now, I just pray that God will give me the drive, and ambition (which I am not) to study and do really well.

I'll just use part of Philippians 1:6 as my mantra.

"...being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion..."